F*** Jeff Hostetler

Getting the Election off on the Right Note

These guys are too funny. Be sure to turn your speakers on.

Perhaps not worksafe, you have been warned

For About Five Minutes There...

I really liked my job. Its always a nice suprise to have really good ribs deliverd to your studio at 7:30 in the morning, just when you were thinking how hungry you were. Then, of couse, you remember you work at Clear Channel.

Way to go, UN

I wonder why this hasn't got any press over here. O wait, I forgot, the UN NEVER FUCKS UP RIGHT!!??! We Americans don't have a clue how to do any sort of foreign policy, lets just let the UN take care of things. Right....

Woman, Thou Art Skinny

They were probably just trying to get her to eat. Damn, that bitch is thin. She kind of has the whole starving ethiopian thing going on...

Dirty, Sad, Disgusting

Go away, internet obsession. I already feel like a loser, you don't have to rub it in. Do I have to go to closet-fangirl-anonymous? Nevermind that there are tons of shrines out there to tempt me. I just have to repeat the mantra...

"I will not stoop to writing fan fiction"
"I will not stoop to writing fan fiction"
"I will not stoop to writing fan fiction"

No, you cannot guess what it is, either. Even if you do, I will deny it within an inch of my life.


However, in my sick obsession, I found this funny...
Via Nerds of Prey

AHAHAHAHAH!!

Sheeeet....

Rundown from PA

Here are some hints about intra-state travel on the highways that we all should know about but no one (except me) in my immediate family follows.
1. It is NOT a good idea to drive on a major metro area highway 5 mph under the speed limit.
2. It is NOT a good idea to badger the driver, telling her that going the speed limit or five over is TOO FAST or constatnly complaining about "..crawling up other people's tailpipe." It takes concentration to drive 7-8 hours. Don't bug the driver.
3. Let the driver listen to music that she wants to listen to and not horrible covers of Cole Porter songs from some crap movie.
4. When driving back from a stresful trip that involved a funeral, its not a good idea to tell the driver to stop everytime the passenger sees "Pottery Outlet, Antique Mall or Candy Closeout". I want to get the fuck home, not browse through mountains of irregular flour and sugar jars, bowls and plates. This type of activity stretched an 8 hour drive to about 10 hours.
5. No I don't want to play "I spy". No I don't want to sing songs.
6. Don't try to convert the driver. I'm trying to keep you from dying, I'm not trying to hear about Jesus. I don't care that you think I'm living in sin or that Catholicism is a "phase that we all go through". Sit down, look out the window (but don't tell me what you see out the window, jackass) and shut the fuck up.

This has been a public service annoucement for Save Lepus's Sanity.

Gak

Beaver, PA is fun, and not because its named Beaver...

Live from Pennsylvania

I'm here til Monday. I have to go to a funeral and get drunk with my relatives.
Have a good one and "..put the 'fun' back in 'funeral'."

The Bizarre Campaign of Jim Bunning

This story is getting stranger and stranger. Since the expose (sort of) in Salon, most people thought that it was simply a matter of Bunning being an ass, which is a well documented fact of Kentucky political lore. However, this story seriously makes one question his mental ability to represent this state in Washington. I have heard several theories, but now after reading the story, one in particular seems to fit pretty well. I won't say what it is, but perhaps its creator might as the spiral continues downward.

Cool

I want it. This one looks pretty cool, too. I'm not going to follow this Ipod/Apple cult.

"Be Alot Cooler If You Did"

WOW.

RIP

The Hollywood Trio is now complete. RIP Superman.
On a lighter note..
Not mine, although I wish it was...

Note To Sean Penn

Dude, its puppets....

*Remember kids, Mr. Spicoli is smarter than all of us.*
It seems that he has an overabundance of time as well as smarts.

Welcome To Internet Stalkerdom

I am on the road to becoming an internet stalker. I hope that all you people that told me to sign up on that damn mojo site are happy. So pretty, so dark, so petulant...*sigh*

(No, I'm not going to tell you who it is)

On a Side Note

Someone left the "Kraftwerk-Computerworld" CD in the studio. For some reason, I find that very funny.

Night Terrors

Dreams are strange things. They make you fearful of things that you really shouldn't be scared of. This dream started off at a very swank and hedonistic party somewhere in a tropical setting. I remember distinctly that Gene Simons was strolling around somewhere. Anyways, I was bitten by a spider and instead of gaining super DNA powers, I turned into a spider breeding machine. I had webs all over my body, and I tried to kill myself several times, but for some reason, I couldn't die. Then yet another odd occurance, the tropical paradise froze over and a giant spider woman with the face of Goldie Hawn started chasing me after I was rid of the spider breeding machine moniker. Then I remember a frozen George W. Bush holding a beach ball was cut from the ice. He had a very suprised look on his face and was wearing tropical swim trunks. I also remember very odd little details that will probably actually happen to me at some point in the next six months. Like the exact color, location and feel of the couch that I sat on right after I was bitten by the spider. Or the fact that my clothes and such from this tropical trip where thrown in bundles outside my room. Just piles and piles of clothes hanging outside the room.

Honestly, I don't really have to be psychic to know that will happen. The piles of clothes, I mean.

Schlock the Vote

Rock the Vote has their own agenda??? Say it ain't so.
Tanks to Dean

My New Election Standpoint

I have a new mantra whenever someone wants to talk politics with me.
"(fakes a seizure, foams at the mouth)"
I think it'll work...

At the Pearly Gates...

"Hey Everybody, We're going to get laid!"

Godspeed Rodney.

The Duck Has No Pants, The Duck Has No Pants

I remember I was reading Michelle's blog on day and she was so angry/frustrated/whatever, she did an entire story about the obsenity of Donald Duck. I have now reached that point of frustration with the political environment of this country. I couldn't watch the debate. I tried, I really did, but I couldn't stand the site of those two. If this is the best that the two parties can come up with, I certainly hope that the third parties take a giant hint and run someone that has the balls enough to answer questions and not say the same damn thing over and over again. Of course, third party candidates wouldn't dare be allowed to debate with the big two. That would just be horrible. Then, the dear sweet person that I was watching the debate with (who, BTW, would not SHUT THE FUCK UP ABOUT HOW EVIL THE BUSH FAMILY IS!! I GET THE POINT, YOU DON'T LIKE THE BUSHES, NOW STFU, PLEASE FOR THE LOVE OF GOD!) decided that since I was getting frustrated, pissed and moody with the two clods, a movie would be in order. "Ah", I thought " Sweet escapism." At this point in the evening, I would watch Battlefield Earth. At least the idiots on screen had interesting head-gear.

I had no such luck.
Genius boy pulls out the one movie that could put a fitting capper on the evening. Farenheit 9/11. GREAT! WONDERFUL! THE ONLY THING THAT COULD MAKE THIS EVENING BETTER IS IF I GAVE MYSELF TEN PAPER CUTS WITH THE 9/11 REPORT AND THEN TOOK A BATH IN GRAPEFRUIT JUICE!


(the duck has no pants, the duck has no pants, the duck has no pants, the duck has no....)


I am over this election year. If the Bush campaign can't figure out that Kerry's senatorial record is far more interesting than the constant repitition of "LOL FLIP-FLOP, WAFFLE LOL" there is no hope. The Republican party is officially retarded. I'm so frustrated, I have a huge headache. Plus the fact that I have to listen to MIKE FREAKING WARD every damn morning bitch about how evil the "bushies" are. I swear, Ward is turning me into more of a conservative than I already am just because his arguments are SO STUPID. I'm done. I'll write more when I'm not so pissy.

This looks Cool

This looks cool, plus the site is really well done and spooky. We should definately go.

Well, I never...

I saw one of these the other day during a commute around my neighborhood and my jaw about hit the floor. What the hell do you need all that in a car for? It just seems excessive, but I suppose that is what you are paying for. I wouldn't even take it out of the garage, and the guy that was driving it didn't even bother to use a turn signal. WTF???

On a side note, I think he was going to BB's BBQ, so his sense of taste can't be all that warped. That stuff is good.